Live from New York, it's Kristin Wiig!

Out of 11 skits and bits on last night's SNL, hilarilady Kristin Wiig was in 5 of them. Her aping of Suze Orman was spot-on and hilarious if you watch Suze Orman. "Remember, people first. Then money. Then Things. Then Jackets!" and "Over my tan face and pale body..." were two of the best lines from her Orman. Wiig is flawless in her imitation of Suze's over-the-top speaking style.

Not to mention the fact that she opened the show as Silva Spitzer and said everything that needed to be said without saying a word. I thought they should have zoomed in on just her while "Spitzer" was saying "Live from New York..." More Wiig! More Wiiiiig!

Host Jonah Hill wasn't exactly comfortable with live TV, but he KILLED in the digital short with Andy Samberg, which you have to see to believe.



Don't get me wrong, I love Mariah Carey. I have just about every one of her albums, and I actually paid for most of them. But, I do not love her vagina, and I wish she'd stop trying to cram it down my throat --so to speak. Her skirt in the first number on SNL last night was so short I could see her bridge work. And, the low camera angle didn't help. THEN, in the second number, she was wearing jeans from the Dina Martina collection. You could have swiped an Amex card through her camel toe and gotten money out of her! Apparently, Mariah's back, baby. And, her vagina's not taking any prisoners!

And, to NBC: SNL is on the border of ending up on the TiVo Sh*t List because it ends a 1:08 AM, which means us poor old one-tuner TiVo types have to choose between SNL and Comedy Central's SECRET STASH. No fair! SNL is 70% filler and commercials anyway, so why not end at 1:05 (or 1:04) and let us have our censored and uncensored comedy on Saturday night?

Madonna, close your legs for ONCE!

Don't Turn Your Back on The Gays

David Hernandez shocked me on Tuesday night's AMERICAN IDOL by singing "I Saw Her Standing There." It was a desperate performance. He literally looked like he was being chased by wolves throughout. I was just plain confused by his whole vibe.

Well she was just seventeen
You know what I mean
And the way she looked
Was way beyond compare
So how could I dance with another,
Oh, when I saw her standing there

Well she looked at me
and I, I could see
That before too long
I'd fall in love with her
She wouldn't dance with another
Oh, when I saw her standing there

Well my heart went boom
When I crossed that room
And I held her hand in mine

Oh we danced through the night
And we held each other tight
And before too long
I fell in love with her
Now I'll never dance with another
Oh, when I saw her standing there

It just rang SO false to me. Of all the beautiful Lennon/McCartney songs to choose from, the gay stripper chooses, "I Saw Her Standing There"?! I mean, really?! The more I thought about it, the more I thought he would be the one to go. That's easy to blog after the results show, but there is precedent. Mandisa was a powerhouse on IDOL, but as soon as she went "gospel" I tuned her out as did MANY voting gays, and she was gone the next week. According to popsurfing.com when she intro-ed her song Mandisa said, "This song goes out to everyone who wants to be free! Your addiction, your lifestyle, your situation may be big. But God is bigger." Lifestyle can't mean anything but "gay lifestyle." She would have been smarter to keep her anti-gay prejudice to herself until AFTER winning the competition. Gays don't need to break free, Mandisa. Poor David Hernandez is relegated to the lower ranks of formerly sexy idols touring county fairs, and making appearances at my local Safeway in the ass-pit of Seattle. You just can't sell out your sisters and expect us to vote for you, bro.

Li'l Anderson. Tee hee.

Anderson Cooper co-hosted LIVE WITH [ANYONE BUT REGIS LATELY] & KELLY, and Coop's never more like a giggly school girl than when he's dishing the dirt and doing Paula Abdul imitations (no lie) with Kelly Ripa. Thank you, Kelly, for making Coop almost comfortable enough to show an emotion. Today's episode was one of the top ten LIVE W/ R&K episodes ever. Sadly, I can't embed the video, but you can see for yourself on the R&K web viewer.

Whore-ton Hears a Who

Was I tripping on acid from 8:58 to 9:02 Pacific Daylight Time? Was almost EVERY idol out of tune and dressed like they're on their way to the mall? And, was Jim Carey wearing a giant elephant costume on national television? How much did they pay him for that?! That's new-house humiliation.

Why isn't THIS a SHOW?!?!

There is NOTHING but CRAP on TV lately, and I would watch an hour (40 minutes on TiVo) of this EVERY morning! More Rosie, PLEASE!

Fierce! Hot Mess! Tranny!

Fierce!











Hot Mess!











Tranny!

American Trainwreck

Because there's nothing else to talk about besides how unbelievably shitty we've allowed the world to become, let's talk about AMERICAN IDOL! With the money Fox spent on that terrible new opening to replace their old terrible opening, I could have bought a latte. Jesus Christ, Fox, could you spend a little dough on the opening credits of your most successful show ever? So, it appears that if Ryan were to ever actually slip and call Simon, "a Viagra popping old misanthrope" that Simon would retort by calling Ryan, "a homosexual." You could cut the sexual tension with a spork! Is it me or are they hinting SO hard that Ryan is gay that it's become a leitmotif of the series? I could have used a LOT less of Simon being a bitchy snatch to Paula and Ryan. It's one thing to be critical, but it's another thing to be a dick, Simon.

Syesha: Poor thing. She wasn't great, but could Paula --at least-- have given her minor props for being the first singer on that giant, confusing new set? She could be going home.

Chikeze: G-d damn! I love me some Chikeze! He turned that song OUT! His performance is what AMERICAN IDOL is all about.

Ramiele Malubay: Besides having the best name ever, Ramiele's song was BEAUTIFUL. 100% gorgeous and lovely. One of my favorites of the night! Booooo! to the back of the judges heads for not knowing a beautiful song when they hear one.

Jason Castro bugs the CRAP out of me! He's like an alien robot programmed to be cheesy.

Carly Smithson: Daaaamn. She really rocked it. The mark of a truly amazing singer is when they can sing a song where NONE of the words make ANY sense and still just rock it!

David Cook: He's good. And, he's cute in a good weird way, but I'm just not buying into him yet. He's a little too chainwallet for my taste.

Brooke White: Zzzzzzzz. Sniff sniff. Zzzzzzz.

David Hernandez: Did that queen really sing, "...I wouldn't [lap] dance with another... cause I saw HER standing there"!?

Amanda Overmyer: Rocked it!!

Michael Johns: First of all, this dude is stupid hot. He could sing the Koran and it would give me a boner. I just like to watch his lips move. Oh, and he can sing really good too.

Kristy Lee Cook: Her performance would have brought the house down at the CMAs, but here's another instance of all the judges saying (last week), "Yeah, dawg, go with the country vibe, dude." Then, this week she goes country and gets savaged by the judges (even Paula!). I liked it, and I don't love country music.

David Archuleta: Well, everyone's got to have one bad week. The paranoid schizophrenic in me wants to believe that the producers told him to mess it up, so it wouldn't be obvious that he's the winner. I don't want to sit through 12 weeks of this dreck if I already know who wins!

Who did you vote for?

Haulin' House

HGTV's HAULIN' HOUSE is one show I am always happy to find on my TiVo. Here's one particular episode from 2006 you have got to catch! Do not miss this show! It will re-air on May 21, 2008 11:00 PM ET/PT and May 22, 2008 3:00 AM ET/PT. From the HGTV website "Hydraulic Haul Episode #102 -- Meg and Marty O'Connell lost their home to hurricane Katrina. The quickest way for them to get out of their [FEMA] trailer and back into a new house is to move one in. But, the 100-mile route through post-Katrina New Orleans could destroy their new house. Abandoned cars, debris piles, bridges and low underpasses will force the mover to raise, lower and tilt the house to avoid every obstacle. A special one-of-a-kind hydraulic trailer is called in for the job, but will it deliver Meg & Marty's future home safely?" Of course it will, but I swear my jaw was on the floor throughout this entire episode. The truck they use to move the house is a modern miracle. It's like a hydraulic hopping car, but it's a HUGE flatbed truck that a house fits on. You really have to see it in action to be wowed, and you will be! Also, the couple are adorable. They have such an incredible attitude about demolishing their old house and trucking a new one 100 miles through hurricane ravaged New Orleans. The guy in charge of moving the house (see photo) is a sexy little dude with amazing confidence. He really directs the move like clockwork despite the constant stream of unexpected challenges. Put the rebroadcast on your calendar, and set your TiVo in May! Here's a tiny clip, but it's only a taste. You have to see this thing in action.

American Gladiators

So, among the dire predictions from my childhood that have come true (1984, America turning into puritanical England circa 1620, $6.00 cigarettes, and $4.00 gasoline, etc.) SURVIVOR has now become the American version of the deadly gladiator sports of ancient Rome. The prevailing wisdom of the 70's and 80's was that when we started cheering on personal injury and death on TV civilization would be over. Well, last night the reward challenge on SURVIVOR was the most brutal thing I've ever seen on TV, and I watch THE ULTIMATE FIGHTER. Last night insurance industry actuaries around the world were wincing. MY insurance rates went up because of the gross negligence exhibited on SURVIVOR. At least in the UFC there's a trained ref on hand, and both the contenders are in shape. Last night, big beefy Joel was literally dragging poor pathetic sad gay Chet through the mud because Chad just wouldn't stand up an move. Miraculously, Chet wasn't injured (probably because he just went limp while being dragged around). Others were not so lucky, and the injury toll is clearly a new SURVIVOR record. Jonathan Penner punctured his leg and it was deeeep. Amy wrenched her knee. I think it was Eliza who is lucky to have a face after getting slammed into a tree face first. I love SURVIVOR, but just like every other show, they're desperate to "take it to the next level," and now we know that the next level is likely to be death.

Project Hot Tranny Mess, Girl!

Yay! I'm so happy that Christian Siriano won PROJECT RUNWAY last night. Oh! Don't read this if you haven't already watched the finale. Though, he's on Regis and Kelly (and g-d knows how many other trainwreck chat shows) this morning, so you probably already know.

Despite the fact that I was really upset at about 2/3 of this season's PROJECT RUNWAY episodes because they producers and the judges did not appear to be going to the same meetings. The producers repeatedly threw the contestants to the lions with hare-brained ideas and a half a day to pull them off. I mean, they almost killed Jack Mackenroth for chrissakes.

In the end, all 3 finalists produced GORGEOUS gasp-worthy collections. Though, someone should tell Rami that he's colorblind. I think that Chris' collection was more cohesive and attention-grabbing than Rami's. I think if all 4 "finalists" had walked at Fashion Week, Rami's collection would have stuck out like a sore thumb. It wasn't fashion forward.

I thought Jillian deserved "second place" because her collection could appear in Elle Magazine, while Rami's collection could appear in South Beach Magazine or Palm Beach Magazine. Lovely for 40-50something women of a particular social status. Jillian's collection was fun and the details were fantastic. She should just focus on making knitwear and coats and she'll make millions.

Christian's collection made me gasp out loud a couple of times. And, I really could see Victoria Beckham wearing every one of his pieces. If they knew she was going to be the judge, then Christian had an unfair advantage since he can probably channel her if he concentrates really hard. One thing I really like about reality TV is watching (other) people's dreams come true before their very eyes. And, it's very rare that one ever gets to see a little gay boy's dreams come true before his very eyes. I got emotional when Vicky called Christian's collection, "Major." It was a beautiful life-changing ultragay moment.

And while we're talking about ultragay meowments, please to enjoy this clip of my future husband, Tim Gunn and Christian having an impromptu walk-off. Props to Bravo for continuing to pioneer the frontiers of queer basic cable TV.

Bad Patty

Usually Patricia Heaton makes me itch like chiggers in my pubes. I just do NOT like her. I've NEVER liked her in ANYthing she's been in. Everybody does NOT love Raymond. And Kelsey Grammer is a right-wing nut-job. Anyway, don't fast forward through Patty Heaton on Regis & Kelly today or you'll miss her ribald story about going to a Korean bath. The best acting job she's ever done is her imitation of an old Korean woman shouting "Spread your legs! Spread your legs!"

HATEful day on TV

Ugh, "happy" Washington's Birthday. Ellen RUINED my morning by calling Dictator Bush to wish HIM a happy President's Day. She IS high on cough medicine or something. I almost threw up. It totally shakes my view of Ellen. Ellen, how could you? What were you going to say if he answered? "Thank you for working for 7 years to change our Constitution to discriminate against me and all other homosexuals? Thank you for plunging our country into an endless pointless war that's killed tens of thousands of innocent people? Thank you for being fiscally and socially irresponsible and blatantly beholden to the right-wing religious zealots who have sent this country backward into the dark ages?" Yeah, happy Washington's Birthday, Ellen. I turned the show off and deleted it from my TiVo.

Before Ellen's well-wishes for our butcher of a "president" my morning got off to a rocky start when, Sherri Sheppard finally crossed that HATE line today on THE VIEW. I can take her ignorant "I don't know if the earth is round" bullsh*t, but today she was ignorant AND hateful. The ladies on THE VIEW were talking about the story of two male penguins who raise an abandoned egg together. It's based on a true story that happened at the Central Park Zoo, and it shows the communal nature of penguins in the wild. But, of course, ignorant and hateful Sherri Sheppard is scared of the book because her tiny mind "thinks" that it spreads the homosexual agenda. And, that her 2 year old son will catch the gay from a children's book. Oh g-d help me if I actually start taking Elizabitch Hasselbitch's side on THE VIEW. Who knew that a young female Black comedienne would make Elizabitch look like a moderate. The world's gone mad! I'm turning the TV off for today. I've had enough.

It's an S-n-P thang!

One of my favorite bands of ALL time is Salt-N-Pepa who now have a fantastic new show (in its second cycle) on VH1. They are the most hilarious odd couple. Sandy (Pep) is outrageous to a fault 24/7 and Cheryl (Salt) has settled WAY down to suburban life and church choirs. Even if you don't love them, it's fun to watch them navigate their career as a duo when their lives have diverged from their hip hop pioneering days. If you do like their music, when they do perform it's like flipping a switch. They start tossing mad raps around like they're 18 again. They also had a moving episode where the families of both Salt & Pepa traveled to Jena, Louisiana to attend the civil rights march. Mostly they just shop and argue. It's great!

Musings.

Rest In Peace old iBook laptop that I loved so much. Now that my laptop is no more, I can't blog from the sectional any longer. I now have to blog from my desk sitting fully upright, and frankly, it's NOT the same. I also continue to mourn the death of television recently. There is little else but CRAP on, and the few good shows are all on opposite each other (AMERICAN IDOL vs. BIGGEST LOSER and THE SALT N PEPA SHOW vs. MAKING THE BAND). Why don't more networks follow the lead of the NBC/GE/Universal mega corporation and repeat their hit shows on multiple networks? There's usually a BIGGEST LOSER season marathon on Bravo after the show wraps up on NBC. I'm planning to catch that. I'll watch all 72 hours of it in 48 hours on TiVo in one weekend! One of my favorite enigmatic super-marathons is the week-long AMERICA'S NEXT TOP MODEL marathon that Viacom/CW/MTV/VH1 runs at least once a year on MTV and/or VH1 and/or MTV2. Speaking of MTV2, back when they used to actually show videos, at least once a year they would play EVERY music video in alphabetical order for (what seemed like) ever. NBC showed episodes of 30 ROCK on Bravo when it was struggling originally. At their heights, I think both PROJECT RUNWAY and QUEER EYE had episodes air on NBC in Primetime on slow nights.

Finally

Finally! After over a week of downright sh*tty TV, I have something to live for. MAKING THE BAND 4 is everything I could have dreamed (since 2 days ago when I found out it was on). Though, so help me g-d if Diddy fires Aubrey, I will immediately stop watching the show. Damn! I love me some Danity Kane! And, I also love me some Donnie! Donnie is so damn cute that I don't even care that he's straight. I'm a little intimigusted by Diddy and the Bad Boy "lifestyle." At one point it looks like Diddy is wearing a jacket made out of kitten fur. He seems like the kind of guy who would just reach into your chest and rip your heart out and show it to your before he sells it for a profit. Fortunately -- and I mean no disrespect by this -- Diddy isn't the focus of the show. I'm salivating for the new Danity Kane album. How fun to get to watch them record it (and then throw a fit when Diddy hates their introspective chick-songs and tries to turn them into the Mary Jane Girls). And, I'll probably like a couple of the Donnie songs too. The "sneak preview" of the upcoming season looks like a buttload of fun. And speaking of a buttload, the other show that is filling my life with joy is the 83rd season of REAL WORLD/ROAD RULES CHALLENGE: THE GAUNTLET 3. Jesus H. Ricecakes! Beth has got to be pushing 40, and she's still showing up to these shows. I'm fascinated by the behavior on RW/RRC:TG3. MTV takes 18 or 20 "young" people who are only famous for being drunken whores and fratty hooligans and puts them in a remote mansion in a tropical paradise with an open bar, hot tub, and pool to compete for $400,00 (split like 6 ways). So far, about 20 minutes into this season there's been boy on boy action, girl on girl action, guy on girl action, a 3-way ("latifah"), and lord only knows what else. If CT weren't an inhuman monster, I would have the hugest crush on him. Oh, and thank you jesus for crazy-as-a-sh*thouse-rat, Brooke! She hasn't "gone off" yet, but it's just a matter of time. So, that's what I'm FINALLY watching, and it was almost worth the wait.

How do they DO it?!

If I believed in Jesus, I would thank him for AMERICAN IDOL. It's so much more than a singing competition and a karaoke train wreck. AI is a window into the dark heart of America. Simon shows us just how "nicey nicey" we've become on the surface. And, I want whatever Seacrest is taking to remain so preternaturally chipper for 8 hours with the mentally unbalanced and their relatives and friends and on occasion -- people they met in the parking lot on the way there. One of the first thing Seacrest voiced over was that it hardly seemed like they'd been away. Truer words were never spoken. The show is almost shot for shot a repeat of last year, yet I couldn't have loved it more! FINALLY! a reason to embrace the writer's strike. The montage of LOUD singers made Quincy's ears perk up. I find it interesting that what eventually turns into a semi-serious singing/popularity contest garnering millions of votes starts off presenting some of the greatest horrors lurking in the amature American musical theatre. Chapter one of this year's freak show offered up the usual cavalcade of mentally unbalanced individuals abandoned by the US health care "system" who are encouraged to sing by their inbred relatives and cruel friends. That Willem-Dafoe-Gurl is going to be a co-host on THE VIEW by the end of the week followed by a brief stint on CELEBRITY REHAB with Dr. Drew. The stalker guy might have made it to the next round on LAST COMIC STANDING. The Princess Leah (prisoner of Jabba The Hutt) Guy was doing some deeply personal type of performance art that I hope helped him work some sh*t out. Coincidentally, The Princess Leah Girl was also working out some deep childhood traumas on America during her "audition." At least they won't ask her to be a co-host on THE VIEW. Speaking of... Blake "I'm Not Gay" Lewis was on THE "Very GAY" VIEW today saying that he can't stand to watch AI because the sound of people singing out of tune is like nails on a chalkboard to him. Ouch! I guess Ryan won't return his calls. I'm looking forward to hours and hours of this multi-car pileup. Though, because I'm enjoying JPOD on CBC, I'm going to have to abandon THE BIGGEST LOSER: COUPLES and catch the marathon Bravo in a few months. SPOILER ALERT: I'm telling you right now that the two heaviest guys are gonna win.

Project Lameway

At the risk of ruining the burgeoning romance with my fiancé Tim Gunn, I have to express my
sadness at this season's PROJECT RUNWAY. It seems like there is a disconnect between the producers and the judges. There are some examples in the Jan 9 episode. First of all, a prom dress competition?! In my mind, prom dresses are like the antithesis of modern fashion. There is a prom dress-code. Trust me. I tried to be innovative at my prom, and I felt like a pariah. I was afraid to go into the bathroom alone for fear of a good beating! Plus, the designers had to take input from 16 year old girls yet still "keep their style or voice" in the garment. There are only MAYBE 3 of the designers whose style I would say is appropriate for 16 year old girls and one of them won the competition. Sweet Pea's dress was by far my favorite, and her style does NOT stroke me as "prommy." That cockatoo guy was probably the most appropriate designer for young girls and he got stuck with a nightmare reject from MY SUPER SWEET 16. How the hell is Nina Garcia --who was NEVER as much of a little girl as Michael Koors-- supposed to judge a prom dress?! And, why was the fourth judge some old foreign dude and not an editor from Seventeen magazine or Elle Girl? I'm not even (currently) a television producer and I could have picked a better fourth judge. The whole show was a mess. THEN, poor Kevin's girl! She appeared to love the dress and strutted it out on the runway and then Heidi Klum says with a sneer, "I think the dress looks cheap" and all the old gay judges agree WHILE THE GIRL WAS STANDING RIGHT THERE! They didn't show if Rami's promster liked her dress. She appeared to love it, but then the judges savaged it calling it "old fashioned" and saying -- again, while she was standing there in the dress-- that she looked like, "a 35 year old lady on her way to lunch." I'm pretty sure that's exactly what every 16 year old girl wants to hear on national television in her prom dress. And the show was taped in like June, so those chicks could have REALLY been going to their prom in those "old fashioned" "matronly" dresses. The show is just all over the place this season. Tim and the judges keep saying, "We want to see more of you!" Well, they voted out the costume designer guy for showing too much of himself, and since he's been back he's toned it WAY down, and he's still there. And, what the heck was up with the Hershey's challenge? How are the judges supposed to judge designer women's fashion made out of cheap brown pillows? I really hope the rest of the season pulls it together.

I just don't understand!?

How can TIM GUNN be single?! I just saw Mr. Gunn on Ellen talking about how no one ever comes on to him. He said that the head of Bravo told him that he'd be "married" within a year of PROJECT RUNWAY's premiere, but he's still waiting over 2 years later.

He's so smooth, handsome, and debonair. NO ONE is freakin' debonair anymore. You can't BUY debonair at Barneys these days! I'm sure he's making good money for Bravo and Liz Claiborne. Good job. Good teeth. Good hair. He's a catch!

Tim Gunn, wait no longer! Just because we've never met doesn't mean that we're not perfect for each other. I pre-accept the proposal you're sure to make shortly after we meet.

American Snoozinators

Why is AMERICAN GLADIATORS so freakin' boring and lame?! I ask that as someone who's watched every single FEAR FACTOR episode ever and LOVED every second of it. I also used to enjoy AG when it was on originally, and they've barely changed it. So, why was a bored to tears by the first two episodes? I think the show was so far ahead of its time that now it seems cliche and tired. DOG EAT DOG (which was truly awful on SO many levels) was still better than the new AG. Even MXC on SPIKE is better than AG, and it's a straight-up joke. Maybe I'm just disappointed because I was hoping for real live lion attacks on the new AG. I mean, these days, if you're going to call a show AMERICAN GLADIATORS, I kinda want to see some guy get his leg eaten by a lion. I'm sure NBC could find people willing to risk losing their leg to a lion to win enough money to pay off their student loans or mortgage. maybe there should be a show called WHAT WOULD YOU DO FOR A MILLION DOLLARS? This has FOX written all over it! Anyway, sadly, the new AMERICAN GLADIATORS is so lame it only makes me miss all the shows like it that have been canceled. Don't watch it.

Clipdown '07

If you only watch one best of the worst of the year clip shows, watch THE SOUP CLIPDOWN '07 playing all week on E!

And, if you only have a half an hour to catch up on pop culture, then treat yourself to THE SOUP every Friday night on E! It also repeats about 50 times through the following week, so you really have NO excuse!

Joel McHale (who no one will remember from the utterly forgettable Seattle 90's train wreck ALMOST LIVE!) hosts THE SOUP, which wraps up the best and worst of the week in pop culture in a sassy, irreverent mix of spoofs, clips, and weird special guests (usually spoofing themselves). Unlike me, you probably won't actually watch 20 reality, talk, and gossipmongering tv shows every week, and you need ALL that information in a compact format.

No News Is Bad News

I'm once again fed up with my local TV news. Ever since the Bush regime's smack-down on speaking the truth, local TV news can't seem to get over the hump of realizing what reporters used to do before Bush. They used to dig for facts and they used to report in the interest of the viewers. Simple stories are always missing very vital information. No one is ever at fault, so the story is never about the facts. One example is the recent story about Seattle's new red light traffic cameras. Seattle is NOTORIOUS for having really messed up traffic light timing. It seems to stem from a 1960s era decision to retard the flow of traffic. Except now that traffic levels are quadruple what they were in 1960, the lights are still timed the same. And when new lights are added, they fall into the mess of the other lights. Most travelers are forced to stop at every single traffic light so no one can ever speed. (or get anywhere). In order to get through a few lights in a row, most Seattle drivers (who care about getting through a few lights at a time) speed up and risk running a few yellow lights or red lights. This situation has been brought up repeatedly with the city who denies the lights are improperly timed, and when people point out specific problems with light timing, the city always says, "We investigated the problem and found that the lights were out of sync, so we made an adjustment." Well, ALL the lights are out of sync, did you ever think of that?! Now, Seattle is installing many, many red light cameras to "crack down" on a deeply flawed system they created. Not ONE news report mentions anything about Seattle's screwy traffic light timing or the fact that red light cameras don't make intersections safer (accident rates don't drop). In fact, most TV news reports mention a "city study" that "finds" that "red light cameras make driving safer," which is simply not true based on reports from cities where they've had red light cameras for years. Even the newspapers dropped the ball on this story. No one even brings up the question of where the money from the red light cameras will go. The city is going to make a LOT of money off these cameras, but where will it be spent? Will it help to pay for re-timing all the other traffic lights in Seattle? Will it go to pay for another stadium we don't need? Will it go to pay for more light rail that will never open and goes nowhere? Reporters really need to dig a little and not just parrot the city press releases.

Strike Out

I occasionally watch the TONIGHT SHOW with Jay Leno, and I was interested to see what the show would be like without writers. Quite frankly, I don't miss the writers. I support their quest for more money, but I think the strike is in danger of collapsing if too many shows come back and especially if the shows are good. The TONIGHT SHOW is lighter and funnier than with writers at least so far. There's a slight sense of danger. The WORST thing in TV (especially these days) is dead air. But now, when Jay or Conan runs out of material, they just stop and wait for something to happen, and it usually does. Ellen's daytime show ran for WEEKS without her writers, and it too not only survived but also seemed to gain a "right-now" quality that I find appealing. It's not an easy thing to fill 39-40 minutes of "live" show day after day, but I think the challenge facing writerless hosts has made them step up their game.

You're not the biggest loser

Ok, I'll admit I'm completely addicted to THE BIGGEST LOSER. But, I have just GOT to say that it's a 2 hour show consisting mostly of morbidly obese Americans getting weighed in very revealing clothes. It's a ratings monster that's become a mini-industry. There was barely 3 weeks between the end of the last season and the new one that started tonight. Soon, it will be its own 24 hour cable channel. There will be a ticker at the bottom of the screen with live weight updates for all past contestants. How cool would that be?!

Happy Same Ol' New Year

Happy New Year. The "lord" has blessed me today with MY SUPER SWEET 16 - THE MOVIE. Here's where my new blog comes in handy. I watched all 2 hours (minus the commercials) so you never have to. Trust me on this one, you don't want to have to watch this! Despite the incredible cast (Disney sweethearts Aly & AJ, Tina Knowles (Beyonce's mama), Alec Mapa (in possibly his least-gay role ever), Mad TV's Debra Wilson (overacting on a cataclysmic scale), and (the spitting image of) Laurence Hilton-Jacobs (Freddy "Boom Boom" Washington from Welcome Back Kotter) but it's not him) the movie is really boring. Somehow the fun, bitchy, manic excess of the show really doesn't translate to a longer format. Especially when they try to weave in social issues like Katrina and African famine. MSS16-TM comes across more like a "Lifetime Teen" production rather than an MTV production. BTW, my favorite catch phrase from the flick is BFFN: Best Friend For Now.

Please be advised that VH1 is running every episode of AMERICA'S NEXT TOP MODEL in order starting today. Treat yourself to 36 or 53 hours of Tyra Banks. Your life won't seem so sucky. Happy New Year!