Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Happy Anniversary To Us!


Today is our 2nd Anniversary! We're still planning to relaunch in 2010! Until then, follow us on Twitter.

Sunday, November 1, 2009

Get Off The Couch While We Vacuum Underneath

The Sectional Blog is gearing up for a total relaunch in January 2010! Stay tuned!

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Levis versus Toughskins


Kathy Griffin "interviewed" Levi Johnston when she filled in for Larry King. She proceeded to verbally "date" him for 10 minutes. It is hilarious, political, raunchy, and - technically - on CNN.

I'll have some of whatever she's smokin'! :-)

Saturday, August 1, 2009

Hiatus

We've gone fishin'!!

The Sectional -- like MOST of TV -- is on hiatus... sorta. We're still Twittering, but it's just too darn HOT in Seattle to post full blog
posts. Plus, TV has slid into the summer doldrums. It's not pretty.

Set your Twitter to "FOLLOW" and let's micro-blog this August out like mutha! @thesectional

The Twitter feed is in the sidebar to the right too. --->>

See you in September (or October) with new posts about Ben from Ace of Cakes, Jeff from Time Warp, Anderson Cooper, Regis and Kelly and so much more!

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Me and My Llama

I learned a lot from watching public television as a kid. One thing that I have never ever forgotten is the Me & My Llama song from Sesame Street. The first (and only) time that I saw that segment, the song was forever burned in my brain. The nearly 3 minute interstitial has it all: an adorable little girl, a llama, a dentist, and the wild and wonderful streets of Manhattan. There is drama, there is comedy, there is music.

No one I have ever met remembered that piece from Sesame. Until now. God bless YouTube:

Sunday, May 10, 2009

Happy Mother's Day! from SNL

As only Andy Samberg and Justim Timberlake could wish it, Happy Mother's Day.

Thursday, April 30, 2009

Make Him a Supermodel


I love any supermodel show - especially Bravo's Make Me a Supermodel. Extra especially because Jonathan is on it: He's gorgeous and he's British. His only deficit is that he's married. But the fact he wore chaps and wrangled two horses while still looking this good in the photo shoot this week makes up for that fact.

Sunday, April 26, 2009

R.I.P. Dorothy Zbornak


The Sectional is mourning the loss of the beloved Bea Arthur who passed away yesterday from cancer at the age of 83. This old broad will be missed dearly. CBS Sunday Morning did a great feature on her today by rerunning a recent interview. Bea's character Dorothy Zbornak from the brilliant Golden Girls always reminded Patty and me of our grandmother, Mamaw. I'd like to think that they are drinking some gin & tonics somewhere together now.

What is your favorite Bea Arthur memory or character? Tell us!

Friday, April 24, 2009

Happy Friday, Potatoes! The tastiest sandwich on earth!

Happy Friday, Potatoes. Has anyone seen Neil Patrick Harris and Anderson Cooper 360 in the same room at the same time?  I think they're the same person.  Only kelly Ripa knows for sure.  Now just put me between the two and you've got the MOST delicious sandwich on Earth.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

SAVED by SIMON (spoiler alert)

Simon (and allegedly the rest of the judges) saved Justin Timberlake from elimination on Wednesday night's AMERICAN IDOL.  Do you agree? Are you pissed?  Happy? Annoyed? Angry? Post it in the comments section.  Prizes may be lurking in the comments section for commenters drawn at random through Friday.  Just sayin'...

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Eight.

Who was the creepy bald dude in the audience on Tuesday night's AMERICAN IDOL?

Gokey was Michael MacDonald

Kris was kinda like Geraldo mixed with the Backstreet Boys

Lil WAS Angela Bassett as Tina Turner

Anoop was Barry White

Scott is still The Greatest American Hero

Alison is Stevie Nicks (this week)

Matt is still Justin Timberlake

Adam Lambert is... I don't know because FOX cut him off. My AMERICAN IDOL ended BEFORE Adam Lambert's performance. That doesn't seem fair to me. Anyone else miss Adam's performance or just me?

Get it while you can! Here's a YouTube clip of Adam Lambert's performance on AMERICAN IDOL from Tuesday night. I'm am SO mad that THIS is the performance that I didn't get to see because FOX was over by about 5 minutes last night. So, if your DVR or VCR denied you this performance, enjoy it while you can...

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Nine

Any popular song on iTunes?! And no one did "I Love College"!?

Anoop - Usher dressed as Michael Jackson singing like Kayne West.

Megan - Lauren Hill who hates whitey as sung by whitey. Awful.

Gokey - Killed it.

Allison - Perfect. Just a dash of Pat Benatar.

Scott - Still blind. Still cannot sing. AND I hate HATE Billy Joel.

Matt Timberlake - Uh oh. Bad.

Lil - The best! + Ryan threw her a life raft by kidnapping her daughter and selling her to Randy.

Adam - Liza Minnelli is BACK, baby!
Kris - Hot but boring.

Scott, Megan, or even Anoop could go this week. Anyone else and I'm gonna be pissed!

Friday, March 20, 2009

Grey Gardens: The Movie (No, not that one. Or that one. Not the musical.) It's on HBO.

Lord knows I was skeptical, but hopeful that Drew Barrymore's GREY GARDENS would be either so bad it was good or just plain good. The trailer won me over. And, I now am excited to see the movie. Anyone I know got HBO?
LOVE the accents!

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Natasha Richardson: 1963-2009

Mother, wife of Lian Neeson, daughter of Vanessa Redgrave, and Tony award winning-actress Natasha Richardson died Wednesday from injuries sustained during a tragic and unexpected skiing accident.

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

American Idol R.F.D.

Few genres sound as cheesy as country music if done poorly, as evidenced by this week's AMERICAN IDOL. Simon Cowell is a grade A dickwad. He's not even amusing any more. He's just plain offensive. I am so tired of him!! I hope Cara is there to replace him. She's real without being an ass.
Bring on the singin'!
Michael is still a big sexy hulk, but still as boring as a bag of rocks.
Allison can sing anything and make it sound rockin'. Still love her but not as a country singer.
Kris a.k.a. "Tender Dawg" is DELICIOUS! He can sing anything and make me want to jump his married bones.
Lil sounded great, but I just don't "buy" her as a jingoistic shill. Note to Simon Cowell, "Lil" is short for "Lillian" not "Little."
Adam looked like he had major cleavage during his interview. Is Randy Travis a kind of homophobic dick? Or was it just me? The song was a bit of a stretch, but if Grace Jones has covered "Ring Of Fire" who can't?!
Scott is still blind and still can't sing.
Alexis was a bit of a let-down. I love the song "Jolene," but her version was flat and boring. She tried to change it up just a little bit too much and lost the meaning/point of the song.
Danny: Jesus, give me a break! I like him, but I didn't like the song and I didn't like his performance (or his white Brian Fellows jacket).
Anoop ROCKS! Smooooth, sexy, and he can SING!
Megan, who should have been shot in the face after last week's song, and her boobs actually pulled off an insanely difficult song.
Matt was utterly forgettable.
Now get out there and vote, America!

Monday, March 16, 2009

Amazing Phil

The always awesome blog Towleroad is taking an informal poll on how many people did a DVR-rewind double-take while watching last night's unexpectedly sexy episode of THE AMAZING RACE. Amazing!

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Worth 1000


My personal favorite from worth1000.com. Happy Friday on Monday. Yes, that's how far behind I am.

Saturday, March 14, 2009

Barbie Wiig

The highlight of a mostly hilarious SNL this week was Kristin Wiig as Barbie on Weekend Update. Wiig continues to steal every sketch she's in. Her "dancing lady" on the HIGH I.Q. sketch was silly, but she was 100% committed to it. Brilliant! AND, I love that NBC is putting the SNL musical performances on the web. If you missed the show - because you have a life or don't have a DVR - here are my selected highlights.
Wiig as Barbie:

THE VIEW sketch. Now with almost 2 women:

I loooove me some Kelly Clarkson:

BS Galactica

Dear Sci-Fi Channel and BS Galactica Producers,
I want the hours and hours and hours I've wasted watching the final 1/2 of the final season of BATTLESTAR GALACTICRAP. What in the fracking hell are you people trying to pull. You had a wealth of story lines to follow, and all it seems like you've been doing is chasing ghosts and red herrings. I almost don't want to watch the "final episode." I'm scared what kind of crap you're going to pull for the first 115 minutes of the show before ending the entire series on a mysterious enigmatic infuriating note. You've done to your series what the Cylons did to Earth. Frack you!

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

The Untouchables

One of the things that the judges say EVERY season is that there are certain performers and songs that contestants just should never do. One of the "artists" who has more songs on that list than ANY other "singer" is Michael Jackson. So, what a risky way to start the season. Luckily, this season's contestants mostly stepped up to the plate and swung hard. Sports references in an AMERICAN IDOL post? Do I have a fever?!
Lil - Sizzling
Scott - Still blind
Danny - Started off "cruise ship" and end up "Vegas!"
Michael - Looked sexy. Sounded boring. Zzzz!
Jasmine - Fierce and cute!
Kris - Total H.I.L.F.!
Allison - Rockin'!
Anoop Dog - Bit off more than he could chew with that song!
Jorge - ¿QuĂ©?
Megan Joy - WTF?!
Adam - This season's Blake Lewis.
Matt - Very timerberlakian.
Alexis - Got run over and dragged behind her song. Ouch.

Sunday, March 8, 2009

Maybe If We ALL Pray REALLY Hard

Imagine a word without God.

Pray that it really happens!

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Getting Gay With Kids

The opening "number" on tonight's live IDOL results show will give me WAY more horrifying nightmares than the entire 2nd season of Dexter which I JUST finished. So gooood! I wish IDOL had a serial killer component to the show tonight. I even kinda like(d) that Katie Perry song they destroyed making it all the more tragic. TRAGIC! Who does these CHEEE-ZEE arrangements?! The first actual "results" were finally given 17 minutes into the snooze-tastic show. I didn't care for Lil Rounds last night, but she was all people could talk about on today's talk shows. And, now she's in the top 12. I will say that she sounded a little better tonight, but not much. She's NO Mary J Blige. It took 9 minutes to get to the next result. Geeky Alex grasped at straws before finding out he was NOT going through to the next round. At 29 minutes into the show, they let the blind guy know he was through to the next round. I have to be honest, if he wasn't blind he wouldn't even be on the show. He's not that good. Ok, well NONE of my favorites are moving on this week. Bummer. Ok so get to the wild card details. Now. NOW! No such luck. They trotted out the "top 9" again before FINALLY explaining that the judges get to hand pick contestants to compete in the wild card show tomorrow. TOMORROW?! F#ck you FOX! How many TiVos and VCRs do you think I have?! Then the judges announced their "wild 8" (see below) as if they were handing out harvested organs to transplant patients. And, Tatiana?! Really?! Is FOX THAT desperate?!

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Weak 3 on AMERICAN IDOL

Ryan's inane banter is just WRONG. Why would Ryan even talk to the judges on live TV? There's no reason. It seems like Ryan's orders from the producers are, "Be as obnoxious and annoying as possible." Ryan takes people who are nervous enough to pee and he f*cks with them. Then he takes a professional panel of blowhards and asks them ridiculous questions that often lead them off on pointless tangents and embarrassing kerfuffles. Can someone please tell me why I don't like Von Smith? He even reeled it WAY in -- for him -- but I still find him grating as all hell. My 2 WTF!? performances of the night were turned in by Nathaniel (so-queer-it-hurts) and Alex (so-geeky-it-hurts). Nathaniel, the gayest man on the planet, chose a Meatloaf song?! And then the arrangement of the song was completely schizo! And THEN stupid Ryan had to go talk to his grandmother in the audience. AWKWARD! Alex tried to inject some soul into his geeky performance and only accentuated his geeky side. He sounded awful and danced like Elaine on SEINFELD. Not good. Also not good were Taylor who is NOT Alicia Keys, and Jorge who is NOT Julio Iglesias. I loved Kristen's Tracy Chapman song. I thought she was the only singer of the night who really just killed it. She made the song her own and really likable/catchy. Ju'Not's Hey There Delila was the ONLY version of that song I've ever liked. He was my second favorite even though the first part of his song put me to sleep. Lil Rounds also started off rocky but redeemed herself by the end of the song. But she didn't knock it out of the park. She bunted and then ran her booty off. The highlight of my IDOL week 3 was the release of some off-the-hook pics of Adam Lambert. I'm looking forward to next week's "wild card" round to see just how f'ed up FOX makes things. I hope the "wild card" contestants have to cage fight for their spot on the "big show."

Sunday, March 1, 2009

Sicktatoe

I am too sick to blog today, potatoes. I get one cold about once every six years, and then I'm a big baby about it because I feel like I'm going to die from a little bit of sinus pressure. So, what does a sicky do to cheer himself up? One word: Liza!

Friday, February 27, 2009

Happy Friday, Gaytatoes!

My friends on Facebook shared this with me. Gay stereotypes are only funny on Friday, so I saved it until today. Kudos to the filmmaker!

Thursday, February 26, 2009

AMERICAN IDOL RESULTS SHOW: 5 minutes of show 55 minutes of filler

Brooke "Village of the Damned" "Whitey" White (pictured with her family left) was this week's "encouraging" past IDOL loser trotted out to give the 9 losers from tonight's show hope that there is a depressing, hollow life after IDOL. Of course Brooke White was depressing and hollow before IDOL too. Where the F#CK is Ramiele Malubay?! You know I love me some Ramiele Malubay! Adam is emerging as one of my early favorites. He's a real showman like Blake Lewis and Chris Daughtry. Even if he doesn't win, this show will make him. Otherwise, there are still too many people on the show for me to keep straight in my mind. All the rest are one big blur of fake hair, fake tans, and deer-in-the-headlights eyes.P.S. - See last night's post. I so totally called the results! :-)

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Noel Coward's Nick and Norman on AMERICAN IDOL

The 2 hour show's first watchable performance was the tasmanian devilish performance of Nick or Norman who did one of AMERICAN IDOL's most entertaining versions of "And I'm Telling You." But cha had to see it to believe it. I'd almost consider voting for him if I cared enough to pick up my cell phone which is 1 foot away from me right now. I don't. The first three performances were god-awful! Matt G butchered a Coldplay song. It was worse than karaoke. Then Jeanine did a belly flop into a Maroon 5 song. Jasmine was the least awful of the three. IDOL producers also did away with the awkward "red room" post-performance family interviews. Hmmm. Didn't I suggest that last week? One of my biggest beefs with the show is how Ryan can be kinda a dick to terrified performers about to go out and perform for the first time on live TV. Who TF comes up with the inane and unanswerable questions Ryan asks the performers and their relations?! "How does it feel to be here?!" It's indescribable, Ryan. To even try to describe it is to ruin it, so thanks for that. Then FINALLY, almost an hour into the show, Allison came out and KILLED it. She ROCKED a Heart song, which is not easy to do. Give her a good dye-job and she could be a hit. Kris also rocked it, a Michael Jackson song no less. He did just enough to make it different without ruining the original. Megan was just OK. Matt the welder was boring and he can't move behind the mic. He looked like a hefty robot trying to dance. Jesse did a VERY karaoke version of a song that should be added to the list of songs one should NEVER sing on IDOL, "Bette Davis Eyes." You just can't make the song sound "current" and the band's lame-ass arrangement doesn't help. Kai -- who I don't remember from any show before tonight -- sleepwalked through another karaoke performance of a stale Motown hit. I didn't care for him or his stealing the haircut I had in 1991. Zzzzz. I wanted to like Mishavonna, but her song choice was lackluster to say the least. She just didn't shine. And then there was Adam Lambert -- aka Mr. Musical Theatre -- who chose to sing a Rolling Stones song, "Satisfaction." And like Constantine Maroulis risen from the grave, Adam kinda rocked it in a very good over-the-top performance. It was pretty good over all, though. It was the second most entertaining performance of the night after Nick and Norman. Paula wanted to lay Adam down and make sweet love to him on the stage. (Maybe Randy did too.) It's pretty clear that the producers arrange the performances based on their rehearsals. Who did you like? Who did you hate? Who will keep you up at night?

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Oh right! The Oscars happened.

This was my favorite Oscars telecast in decades. Hugh Jackman was a slightly surprisingly perfect host. He sang, he danced, and he joked.
And even the Academy joked. This was the funniest part of a pretty funny show.I couldn't find a great photo of Lance Black or Sean Penn, but MILK's wins touched my heart. Kate Winslet also deserved this Oscar sooooo bad that I was thrilled for her win.These photos are from a STUNNING collection by the AP. See all the incredible pics here.

Saturday, February 21, 2009

The Credit Crisis in 11 Minutes

Or how George W. Bush, Alan Greenspan, and a bunch of greedy millionaires and billionaires bilked this country out of our future.

Friday, February 20, 2009

Have a FIERCE Friday, potatoes!

Pam, Richie, and Amanda (and about 32 pounds of silicone) send kisses and blessings upon your Fierce Friday! Get out there and show the world your inner Amanda, or Pam, or Richie.

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

American Idol Live Part 2: Annoying

Wednesday night's IDOL can be summed up in one word: ugh. It was a random whirl of commercialism with commercials. The AMERICAN IDOL EXPERIENCE at MGM/Disney in Florida!? I'm scared. Wednesday night's show was padded with faux FOX drama to the bursting point. Padding included losing contestants from last season, maybe as a way to say to tonight's losers, "See if you're nice to the producers, you may be able to milk this 15 minutes for a few more seconds." How does the whole wild card show work? Will Tatiana get yet another chance to show America her strong Latina side? Will Anoop who was narrowly beat out by deeply ingrained American racism be invited back for another chance? Who IS eligible for that? We'll find out...

... after the break!

American Idol Live Part 1: Messy

AMERICAN IDOL's first live show of the season was a technical and production nightmare. What a MESS! It speaks to Seacrest's talent as a show host that he's so easily able to roll with the punches. It got so bad at one point that a crew member could be heard shouting live on TV at Ryan, "Go to package! Go to package!" Despite the train wreck going on behind the scenes and in the audio booth, MOST of the contestants brought their "A" game. We'll see how Thursday night's show goes. It's on on the East Coast right now. But, let's gawk at Tuesday night's pileup. The musical arrangements are once again totally awful! The karaoke arrangements played by the invisible band don't help the contestants who are verging on karaoke performances. The band sounds like a cheap-ass back-up band at a wedding, bar mitzvah, or other budget celebration. A glassy-eyed Paula Abdul dripping in her own jewelery designs (available on HSN.com) delivered some bad news on Tuesday night, so all the judges got in a few punches. A few of of the contestants even deserved their lumps. I haaated Stevie Wright who butchered a Taylor Swift song. Is that like pooping on poop? She rushed through the song like she had someplace to be. And when Ryan Seacrest throws you a full-on pity party in the "red room" you know your days are numbered. Also awful was Brent Keith's half-hearted "Hicktown" attempt at grabbing the hick vote. I didn't hate Casey Carlson the first time I watched her sing "Every Little Thing HE Does is Magic" by the Police. It could be a pop single in Europe, but the more I thought about it (and watched it again) it seemed like an admission that she didn't really have any knowledge of musical history. I'm old. Sue me. My favorites were (in no particular order) Anoop's Monica cover (sooo sexy!), Stephen Fowler's "Rock With You" which the judges haaaated, Sexy religious widower Danny sang the F#CK out one of my favorite songs, and even Tatiana was good. When did she become a strong (sane) Latina?! She could actually sing, but it did seem like she was a completely different person. How do you solve a problem like Tatiana? FOX made her look like an unholy freak of nature in the pre-taped summer auditions, and then the judges are surprised when Tatiana reels it in and presents herself a bit more professionally?! Humph! So let's see what happens on Wednesday, potatoes!

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Joy Philbin Phan Club!

I LOVE me some Joy Philbin. As much as I love Kelly, I wish Joy would co-host more often. Joy Philbin is a breath of fresh air on TV. She and Regis are so comfortable in front of the camera that anything goes. It makes for very exciting television, especially in the morning. No matter how bat-shit crazy Kathie-Lee Johnson Gifford gets on the 15th hour of the TODAY SHOW, Regis and his old lady have got her beat by a MILE in the entertainment category. Joy co-hosted on today's LIVE WITH REGIS AND KELLY. You can watch the hilarious host-chat online.

Sunday, February 15, 2009

SNL: First Cough

This Saturday's episode of SNL was inexplicably lame. Though, to be honest, I can't point at any one thing. I mean, obviously, I hate Jonas Brothers more than anyone else in music ever. They are just SO bad. In a show with Alec Baldwin, Cameron Diaz, and Dan Akroyd I'm not sure how the show just laid there gasping for breath. I love the Vincent Price Show spoofs. Tonight, Liberace was the best, but Alec Baldwin did a scarily subtle and brilliant Dick Burton. The show was occasionally clever. I also still do not care for Weekend Update with Seth Meyers. Looooorne, Wiig me!!
Wii Guys:

Saturday, February 14, 2009

B.S. Galactica: The "My Dinner With Andre" Episode

Last night on B.S. GALACTICA, the stupidest most asinine show on television this "season," Wallace Shawn and Andre Gregory (pictured left) chatted it up for an entire hour. For a "sci-fi" show, there is a LOT more "fi" than "sci" so far this season. With the rich storyline gold of finding Earth (in ruins no less!), somehow this season has drifted off into space fulfilling Seth Green's prophecy on ROBOT CHICKEN that the identities of the Cylons is simply pulled out of a hat by the producers. Last night's episode which was 99.999% exposition delivered by the weakest actors on the show revealed a LOT of stuff. Starting with... Ellen?! Really?! Sheesh! And now there's ANOTHER Cylon we didn't know about? Is this NBC or FOX? Wait, there's one more surprise! The fracking ship itself, the USS Battlestar Galactica, is now going to become part Cyclon. If I hadn't invested seven years of my life watching 3.75 seasons of this show, I'd just stop right now. I would have stopped 2 minutes into Starbuck's husband's (ex-husband's) visions. Christ on a cracker, anyone on this show who "has a vision" is suddenly the frackin' savior of the species-es. And, are there two species-es of Cylon? Or 1 or 3 or 8? No one knows! I'm SO sad to have to witness the destruction of a once-great TV show in its final 10 episodes. I hope Adama and Ellen blow each other to smithereens. Neither "race" deserves to live after last night's episode!

Friday, February 13, 2009

Happy Friday Angelina Jolie!

As I've mentioned before, I worship the videotape Jeanne Moos of CNN walks on! Here's another dry comment on the insanity that is our world. Congratulations Angelina Jolie, you now have the most famous stalker since Jodie Foster. Yikes! Joan Rivers said today on THE BONNIE HUNT SHOW while talking about Octomom's denial of having plastic surgery that, "She should have those lips sewn shut" gesturing to her face, "and THOSE lips sewn shut too!" gesturing to her vajayjay. She went on to say that the only other woman to have 8 people inside her was Paris Hilton. Now on to Jeanne Moos...

Now THAT's a Survivor!

Now in its 52nd season on stick-in-the-mud network CBS, SURVIVOR has become TV's ultimate survivor. The only reason to watch early episodes each season is for Jeff Probst's snippy remarks to the shell-shocked, filthy, starving contestants. The show's original mind-numbing predictability has given way to a throw-the-chessboard-into-the-air chaos each episode with completely erasing the lines of the game. SURVIVOR continues to feel very planned-out. I guess you have to plan pretty carefully to take a couple hundred people to the Tocantins for 60 days or so. I'm sure it would ruin the "magic" but I would love to see a behind-the-scenes season of SURVIVOR and/or a behind-the-scenes season of THE AMAZING RACE. The shows themselves have become pretty boring, but I sure would love to see each episode followed by a "how'd they did it" hour. Along those lines, the Probster, is blogging on EW.com about this season. Check it out.

David Letterman's Most Uncomfortable Interviews

How to torpedo your career in about 5 minutes.

Farah, hand the crack pipe to Whitney Houston and step away from the TV camera!

Just ONE of the MANY reason I love Drew Barrymore.

And, here's the MOTHERLODE of uncomfortable interviews! Madonna on Letterman in 1994 dropping F-Bombs like the Taliban!

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Change Comes To America... n Idol

No American institution is immune to the wave of change sweeping across America under our new President Ryan Seacrest. Tonight's "Final Round" of Hollywood Week on AMERICAN IDOL was oozing change. No more weird A CHORUS LINE-like spare rehearsal studio. Now the judges lounge like kings and queens in overstuffed chairs in "The Judges' Mansion" making teens and those who the teens have passed by battle each other for a spot on this season show. The Judges Mansion?! What the hell? Do they all live there during the show? Will there be a spin-off show? Do they have "swinging" parties at this "judges' mansion"? Also, Fox should get its money back from whoever upholstered those judges thrones. Tacky and sloppy workmanship. Anyway, also new to the show this year is the "sing off" where the judges pitted contestants against each other and put them on the spot to sing a song to stay on the show. The "sing off" portion of the two hour show was the most stomach churning. Then when the judges FINALLY deliver the news, they pull that tension-building crap by stalling the delivery of the good new with a fake out, "We don't have good news for you..." The contestant is in tears and about to pass out. Then the judges all look sad and then say "...we have GREAT news for you! You're in!" Then the contestant has a spaz attack! The judging panel had a very ANTM feeling (and that is NOT a step UP for AMERICAN IDOL). They have the tough task of "narrowing" the field down to 36. 36!? That's bigger than a football team isn't it? How long is this show gonna be on?! Until next February?! Bat-shit crazy, Tatiana, is this season's Sanjaya Jaya Binks. She's a kook! Rosie O'Donnell's prodigy Von Smith made it through. Sexy, god-loving widower Danny Gokey is gonna be a "story" this season. Anoop Desai is like a gag from a HAROLD AND KUMAR movie, but he can definitely rock out. I'm also keeping my eye on social outcast and Heatherette model (in his own mind), Nathaniel Marshall. Since we've only seen about 10 of the final 36 actually sing, the next few weeks may actually get this Spruce Goose of a season off the ground (or water or whatever). Who do you like? Who do you love? Who do you hate? Can you believe that sexy-god-loving-widower's BFF weird-facial-piercings-guy didn't make it?!

Does Anyone Still Wear A HAT!?!

Elaine Stritch is playing "Royce" in "Royce: The Musical!" featuring the hit song "Quando Quando." Coming to a screen (of some sort) near you.

YouTube is better than TV.