U2 kicked ass even though they are finally starting to look their age. And then. Ok. Um, they announced
Whitney Houston but
Dionne Warwick walked out.
And, the bitch seemed high. High. She sounded like she had a Kool waiting for her in an ashtray just off stage. I'm glad
Jennifer Hudson won and gave a very moving thank you. Then The Rock came out and did his Shatner impersonation. Yikes! I liked Timberlake and the Rev. Al Green. Chris Martin sounded good, but the rapper with him (Kanye? Jay Z? Who was that?!) was awful.
Dreadful! Coldplay sounded good, but I just can't (ever) get excited about them. Even seeing Chris Martin's pubes wasn't exciting. Do they give away any Grammys? Carrie Underwood looked like
White Trash Beyoncé, and I kinda mean that in a good way. I think she always sounds great. Good for her. Then finally one more award. Country. Moving on... Al Green came back with Duffy to sing and give the award for song of the year to Coldplay. Zzzz. Kid Rock. ZZZZZZ. Taylor Swift and
Miley "It's Miley!!" Cyrus did a touching and repulsively "christiany" country-ish song about what it's like to be 15 years old, even though they both look 20+ and act 30+. Then the tweens gave an award to some really old people: Alison Kraus and Robert Plant. Then
Jennifer Hudson came out and showed that she will not be stopped. She REALLY should stick to singing and give up acting, but girlfriend can sing! UGH! The Jonas Brothers and Stevie Wonder performing together?! Even a blind man can see
the Jonas Brothers are the WORST thing to happen to music since Milli Vanilli. OH how I wanted to projectile vomit during their number. Blink 182 showed up to announce they're back together. Travis Barker looked good but a bit shaken. Coldplay won again. I was shocked. Fast forwarding... Craig Ferguson (is he
still on CBS?!) came out to share some humor in bad taste, flub his lines, and introduce the wonderful
Katy Perry, who I love more every time I see her. Or maybe I just love the fag who's dressing her. Estelle sang "American Boy" assisted by Kanye West in a black mullet. They sounded OK. Best New Artist went to
Adele!! Yay! I LOVE me some Adele! She looked gorgeous as usual. She's only 19! Damn! She's so cute! She mentioned (sort of as if she was embarrassed to) that she "loved" the Jonas Brothers. Legally, she could have consentual sex with 2 of the Jonas brothers, I think. Have fun at the after party! Kenny Chesney gives me the
CREEPS! Natalie Cole came out with what looked like a nip slip, Puffy, and Herbie Hancock to award Record of The Year to a crazy list of nominees. ALL over the map. Alison Kraus and Robert Plant won again. Are ALL Grammy members folk singers? What gives?! Queen Latifah came out looking good, but not looking thinner for her Jenny Craig campaign. She awkwardly mentioned something about Dean Martin, and then introduced an all-star "rap pack" lead off by a VERY pregnant
M.I.A. S
he looked hilarious but GREAT! She was followed by Kanye and some other big-time rappers. Didn't sound so great. Kinda dumb to do black and white in the age of HD. Was that Jay Z? Is he rapping again? Beyoncé can't be THAT expensive! Kate Beckinsale showed up for no apparent reason to introduce Sir Paul McCartney, who I am
SO tired of! Moving on... Jack Black and Charlie Hayden (sp?) his father-in-law came out to do more boring Grammy crap. Then they gave out the Best Male Pop Vocal Grammy to...
John Mayer. WOW! I did NOT see THAT coming. Neither did Paul McCartney. Lame speech. A
drunk Jay Mohr and a cool (natch!) LL Cool J introduced Sugarland (Zzzz) and then Adele. Adele sounded perfect as usual. Love her voice. Then Sugarland joined Adele for no reason. Grammys! Stop it! Gwenyth came out in a hot little dress and 18 pairs of panty hose to introduce Radiohead and a marching band. Gwentyh is SO hip. The performance was no "Jill Scott and Blue Man Group" but it was interesting. Justin Timberlake was back to rap with some guy. They were NOT in sync and sounded weird. Maybe it was me. The Grammy big-cheese came out and pointed out that
Obama had won 2 Grammys. He then called for a Secretary of Arts to be added to the cabinet. I'm so tired of the show even though I've been fast forwarding through MUCH of it. The Four Tops tribute was good but didn't thrill me. Speaking of not thrilling me, Josh Groban came out... on to the stage to introduce
Neil Diamond. Ok. Sure, I'm always up for Neil
Diamond. His "rousing" performance of "Sweet Caroline" was so karaoke it was almost meta. Then they showed the memorial reel to those who've passed away this past year. The following are people I thought were already dead: Levi Stubbs, Isaac Hayes, and Bo Diddley. Then an all-star band did a tribute to the recently dead. Speaking of the dead, they did a tribute to New Orleans. Robin Thicke sounds sexy but looks skanky. There I said it. Every award show should bring attention to the fact the New Orleans is STILL a MESS. Best Rap Album went to Lil Wayne (and apparently his whole family). I can't take much more! This show is putting me into a coma. Zoe Dechannel introduced the duo of the evening Alison Krause and Robert Plant whose song was good, but kind of a low-key let-down after all the other over-the-top performances. Green Day showed up
not looking filthy. Album of the year finally went to Alison Krause and Robert Plant.
Shock! Stevie Wonder closed the show on time. Now
Kathy Griffin has to another year to plot and plan to get her Grammy.
U2 kicked ass even though they are finally starting to look their age. And then. Ok. Um, they announced Whitney Houston but Dionne Warwick walked out. And, the bitch seemed high. High. She sounded like she had a Kool waiting for her in an ashtray just off stage. I'm glad Jennifer Hudson won and gave a very moving thank you. Then The Rock came out and did his Shatner impersonation. Yikes! I liked Timberlake and the Rev. Al Green. Chris Martin sounded good, but the rapper with him (Kanye? Jay Z? Who was that?!) was awful. Dreadful! Coldplay sounded good, but I just can't (ever) get excited about them. Even seeing Chris Martin's pubes wasn't exciting. Do they give away any Grammys? Carrie Underwood looked like White Trash Beyoncé, and I kinda mean that in a good way. I think she always sounds great. Good for her. Then finally one more award. Country. Moving on... Al Green came back with Duffy to sing and give the award for song of the year to Coldplay. Zzzz. Kid Rock. ZZZZZZ. Taylor Swift and 
Miley "It's Miley!!" Cyrus did a touching and repulsively "christiany" country-ish song about what it's like to be 15 years old, even though they both look 20+ and act 30+. Then the tweens gave an award to some really old people: Alison Kraus and Robert Plant. Then Jennifer Hudson came out and showed that she will not be stopped. She REALLY should stick to singing and give up acting, but girlfriend can sing! UGH! The Jonas Brothers and Stevie Wonder performing together?! Even a blind man can see the Jonas Brothers are the WORST thing to happen to music since Milli Vanilli. OH how I wanted to projectile vomit during their number. Blink 182 showed up to announce they're back together. Travis Barker looked good but a bit shaken. Coldplay won again. I was shocked. Fast forwarding... Craig Ferguson (is he still on CBS?!) came out to share some humor in bad taste, flub his lines, and introduce the wonderful Katy Perry, who I love more every time I see her. Or maybe I just love the fag who's dressing her. Estelle sang "American Boy" assisted by Kanye West in a black mullet. They sounded OK. Best New Artist went to Adele!! Yay! I LOVE me some Adele! She looked gorgeous as usual. She's only 19! Damn! She's so cute! She mentioned (sort of as if she was embarrassed to) that she "loved" the Jonas Brothers. Legally, she could have consentual sex with 2 of the Jonas brothers, I think. Have fun at the after party! Kenny Chesney gives me the CREEPS! Natalie Cole came out with what looked like a nip slip, Puffy, and Herbie Hancock to award Record of The Year to a crazy list of nominees. ALL over the map. Alison Kraus and Robert Plant won again. Are ALL Grammy members folk singers? What gives?! Queen Latifah came out looking good, but not looking thinner for her Jenny Craig campaign. She awkwardly mentioned something about Dean Martin, and then introduced an all-star "rap pack" lead off by a VERY pregnant M.I.A. S
he looked hilarious but GREAT! She was followed by Kanye and some other big-time rappers. Didn't sound so great. Kinda dumb to do black and white in the age of HD. Was that Jay Z? Is he rapping again? Beyoncé can't be THAT expensive! Kate Beckinsale showed up for no apparent reason to introduce Sir Paul McCartney, who I am SO tired of! Moving on... Jack Black and Charlie Hayden (sp?) his father-in-law came out to do more boring Grammy crap. Then they gave out the Best Male Pop Vocal Grammy to... John Mayer. WOW! I did NOT see THAT coming. Neither did Paul McCartney. Lame speech. A drunk Jay Mohr and a cool (natch!) LL Cool J introduced Sugarland (Zzzz) and then Adele. Adele sounded perfect as usual. Love her voice. Then Sugarland joined Adele for no reason. Grammys! Stop it! Gwenyth came out in a hot little dress and 18 pairs of panty hose to introduce Radiohead and a marching band. Gwentyh is SO hip. The performance was no "Jill Scott and Blue Man Group" but it was interesting. Justin Timberlake was back to rap with some guy. They were NOT in sync and sounded weird. Maybe it was me. The Grammy big-cheese came out and pointed out that Obama had won 2 Grammys. He then called for a Secretary of Arts to be added to the cabinet. I'm so tired of the show even though I've been fast forwarding through MUCH of it. The Four Tops tribute was good but didn't thrill me. Speaking of not thrilling me, Josh Groban came out... on to the stage to introduce Neil Diamond. Ok. Sure, I'm always up for Neil 
Diamond. His "rousing" performance of "Sweet Caroline" was so karaoke it was almost meta. Then they showed the memorial reel to those who've passed away this past year. The following are people I thought were already dead: Levi Stubbs, Isaac Hayes, and Bo Diddley. Then an all-star band did a tribute to the recently dead. Speaking of the dead, they did a tribute to New Orleans. Robin Thicke sounds sexy but looks skanky. There I said it. Every award show should bring attention to the fact the New Orleans is STILL a MESS. Best Rap Album went to Lil Wayne (and apparently his whole family). I can't take much more! This show is putting me into a coma. Zoe Dechannel introduced the duo of the evening Alison Krause and Robert Plant whose song was good, but kind of a low-key let-down after all the other over-the-top performances. Green Day showed up not looking filthy. Album of the year finally went to Alison Krause and Robert Plant. Shock! Stevie Wonder closed the show on time. Now Kathy Griffin has to another year to plot and plan to get her Grammy.
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